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Tea’s Weird Week: Ask Tea Anything (Pandemic Edition)

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Tea’s Weird Week started as an outlet to write about whatever I wanted to once a week, engage readers, and promote stuff I’m working on– books, articles, events. In this year of crazy 2020, I’ve mostly been writing about “conspiracy theories in the news.” I have a book out in August titled American Madness: The Story of the Phantom Patriot and How Conspiracy Theories Hijacked American Consciousness and quite a few people I wrote about have big in 2020: Alex Jones (most recently for leading an anti-quarantine protest in Austin), David Icke (“5G is Coronavirus”), Roger Stone (“Bill Gates is Coronavirus”), QAnon, and Anti-vaxxers have all been in the news this month.

There are new conspiracy stories in the news every day, but I thought I would take a break from analyzing them this week and answer my friend’s questions, solicited through social media. Here’s answers about anti-quarantine protests, doomsday bunkers, cryptozoology, and more.

Real talk. I know you’re all about the absurd and crazy shit. I just gotta know because I care about you- are you planning on going to one of these wingnut anti-stay-at-home/ pro-plague rallies to document? Because, if so, please be safe friend. This is obviously not an encouragement to go be a journalist at one of those. I’m just saying, if you do, be safe as fuck. Also please live long enough to get your own Netflix special because I know you’re capable of that.–Concerned

First, thanks for caring about me. Your message has reminded me that I should be spending some of my spare time messaging people to check in.

Here’s the thing– I really enjoy writing about things that I am enjoy and am genuinely interested in. I have become friends with a lot of people I write about. But sometimes I like getting out of my comfort zone and want to observe something I don’t understand up close. Some examples of this would be attending one of Bob Larson’s “exorcism seminars” for my book Monster Hunters, attending an anti-vaxxer rally and flat earth conference for my book American Madness and most recently, attending a Trump rally (in January, I wrote it up for the Shepherd Express.)

I’m going to sit this one out. I’m processing enough crazy stuff as it is. Watching a bunch of MAGA-hat wearin,’ Gadsen flag wavin’, 2A militia types, anti-vaxxers, etc. shouting about how they demand haircuts just ain’t doing it for me. As far as a Netflix special– as long as I don’t end up getting eaten by a tiger, I’m in!

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Joshua A. Bickel took this iconic photo, which is sure to be used in future texts about this era.

Any thoughts on those fallout type shelters/bunkers at the moment? Or if you know if people are using theirs in the face of pandemic? Just curious and interested in what qualifies those who own space in one to activate its use. –Aims

I think Aims is referring to the Survival Condos, which I toured with my friend Paul while working on a chapter (“Doomsday Bunkers of the Rich and Famous”) for my book Apocalypse Any Day Now. Built into an old Atlas missile silo in Kansas (with more being developed), the building featured several condo units (all sold) and recreation levels.

One thing we were told is that the condo owners had access whenever they wanted. There had recently been a football watching party, and owners would sometimes “vacation” there. As such, it’s possible that the owners could ride out the entire pandemic there if they wanted, and it certainly would be the ultimate quarantine.

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Tea at the Luxury Survival Condos in Kansas.

What’s one conspiracy that most others find false; but, you kinda believe in?— Mando

I’m skeptical about most conspiracies, but I think it’s worth noting that some stuff that seems like conspiracy later turns out to be true. I talk about a few of those in American Madness, the CIA’s Project MK-ultra (a mind control program) being one one quick example. The most believable conspiracy to me is that there has been some kind of UFO cover-up. I don’t mean necessarily extra-terrestrial, but some secret program. There’s just so many compelling UFO cases, I think something is going on. The truth is out there (winking emoticon).

What was really normal, too normal, about one of your subjects that you researched?–Addo

I really love those moments. In my book Heroes in the Night I shared a funny story about how me and Real Life Superhero The Watchman got lost and couldn’t find his car in a parking garage. It was humorously mundane. A lot of Real Life Superheroes were pretty normal outside of their secret lifestyle, as were a lot of paranormal investigators.

One of the major stories I tell in American Madness is that of conspiracist Richard McCaslin. He told me some of the most wild ideas I’ve ever heard– Reptilian aliens secretly controlling our world, Satanists eating babies, all sorts of crazy and terrible things.

Meeting him in person several times, I found I got along with him pretty well and he was friendly and could be oddly normal. I visited him at his house and I remember walking into his kitchen to find him drinking orange juice and laughing as he watched some baby jackrabbits chase each other around his yard in what seemed like a game of tag. It was the first time he said “you gotta see this!” and wasn’t referring to some Illuminati code he had cracked.

Do you have a favorite cryptid?— Matt …and have you ever had a personal experience with one or saw one?— Lynn

If you don’t know, cryptids are creatures studied in cryptozoology. I’ve not had a cryptid encounter myself, but while working on Monster Hunters, I did go on expeditions looking for Sasquatch, a Lake Monster (“Champ” of Lake Champlain), a Skunk Ape, went to the Mothman Festival, and took a ride down Bray Road looking for the Beast. It was all really fun and interesting, I love cryptozoology. I’m working on a writing project about Mothman. I love ’em all, but because of this project, I’m going to declare Mothman as my favorite cryptid, a close second would be Chupacabras.

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Me and Jim Sherman of Bigfoot Field Researchers Organization out in the woods of Michigan on the trail of the Sasquatch.

Would you want to have a really scary experience (alien abduction, possession, angry ghost) just to prove to yourself that it was real? What, if any, would be “too much”?— Judy

When faced with a tough question like this, I try to break it down. On the one hand, it would be pretty intensely transformative to have an experience like that, to witness a deep mystery of the universe. On the other hand, most people wouldn’t believe me anyway, and I know of several cases where people experienced stuff like this (or thought they did) and it damaged them forever. Final conclusion: I’d rather keep it a mystery. I enjoy not knowing.

Of all the people/things you interviewed or investigated was there any thing that you felt you were getting too deep into, or anything that you felt was getting too dangerous or did you fear for your life?— Gregory

The one things that stands out is the crazy night I spent on patrol with Real-Life Superhero Phoenix Jones while working on my book Heroes in the Night. He had pepper-sprayed a group of people that were fighting and they got angry and attacked us. I got punched in the face. At one point it looked like they were trying to get a gun. Then they tried to run us down with an SUV. “I hope this was worth it, cause now you’re going to get murdered,” was definitely a thought that crossed my mind as I was running from the angry, pepper-spray soaked mob. Other experiences– investigating Bobby Mackey’s, a notoriously haunted bar, and diving into some of the conspiracy stuff, has produced frightening moments, but nothing like that.

Thank you all for your questions! I’ll do another “ask me anything” to tie into the release of American Madness in late August or early September– pre-order info below!

Please Clap Dept.: I’ll leave you with some positive vibes– here’s an article I wrote for Milwaukee Magazine on a social distancing nightly dance party: “This Riverwest Neighborhood Dances Every Night at 8.”

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My upcoming book American Madness features a journey through conspiracy culture. It’s out August 25, 2020 from Feral House. To pre-order: CLICK HERE

It’s on Goodreads here: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/52486773-american-madness

Follow me on:
Facebook//Twitter//Instagram//YouTube

 

Having just returned from the grocery store during an official pandemic, I’m reminded to highly recommend Apocalypse Any Day Now, from Tea Krulos, who went way down the doomsday prepper rabbit hole. Fun and unfortunately highly relevant. Do it.” — Brent Gohde, Cedar Block/ Science Strikes Back

Tea’s Weird Week: I got my own conspiracy theory, which is that the world is becoming 24 more times batshit crazy every day

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OR “WEIRD DAY?” “WEIRD HOUR?” “WEIRD TIME IS AN IRRELEVANT CONSTRUCT?” 

Well, my column title says it all. To support this theory, I’ll do as a conspiracist does and string some random crazy scraps together with pieces of yarn. The COVID-19 pandemic has made people snap. Yesterday we got news that a Waukesha, Wisconsin man murdered 2 family members and the family dog (and injured 2 more) back in March (the details were just made known in court) after fears of coronavirus overtook him. In Texas, a Trump supporter named Karen posted a screed dismissing the virus as a “media driven” hoax, and that:

They are leading with fear causing you to panic like sheep…you don’t need hand sanitizer, toilet paper, and Lysol. You need common sense, a sense of direction, faith, a will to fight, and of course, guns!

Well, Karen is dead. She died from COVID-19. The stories are coming in so thick and fast, this column could be re-branded as “Tea’s Weird Day.” Consider, for example, these stories from the last few days:

Conspiracy Theorists Are Destroying 5G Towers Because They Believe There is a 5G/Coronavirus Connection

Over the past week, conspiracy theorists have destroyed the following: a train (see last week’s column: “Conspiracy Theory Trainwreck“), “at least twenty” 5G towers, and quite a few of my brain cells. The hottest conspiracy this week is that 5G Internet is linked to coronavirus. The theory is that “5G radiation” is either exacerbating coronavirus symptoms or that the symptoms are from 5G and the virus was invented as a cover story.  The theories are being spread by a coalition of conspiracy theorists– InfoWars, QAnon, Anti-vaxxers, and David Icke.

David Icke. Yeah.While wrapping up my book American Madness (out in August) I was like gee, I hope there’s some conspiracy stuff going on in 2020 to talk about when the book comes out. Ha! Be careful what you wish for–the last couple months have been an American Madness reunion party– Alex Jones and QAnon have been in the news frequently, and now the sudden bump in interest in Icke. If you don’t know who he is, David Icke is a British conspiracy theorist who has been ranting and raving since the 90s, churning out conspiracy books and delivering lectures, which average 9-10 hours long (that’s not a typo.) He’s most infamous for his theory that a race of extra-terrestrials called the Reptilians (aka “Lizard People”) have infiltrated earth and disguised themselves as human world leaders.

 

Now, through a show called London Real, Icke has reached millions of viewers. The most recent Icke episode was removed by YouTube as the platform cracks down on coronavirus misinformation (as you’ll see in American Madness, YouTube is often too little, too late on these policies.) The YouTube ban has only given Icke more street cred. Across the UK about twenty 5G towers have been burned or otherwise destroyed or damaged, most recently in Belfast, Liverpool, and Birmingham. Some of the towers were actually 3 or 4G towers. There is a growing call on the Internet for people to destroy more.  Tech engineers are being threatened on the street. Obviously, the spread of this idea has dangerous implications– communication systems are being targeted during a pandemic.

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Burning 5G tower in Birmingham.

What’s even more disappointing is that several celebrities have helped entertain and spread the misinformation, including John Cusack, Woody Harrelson, M.I.A., and others (though some have since deleted their posts). I think this is a great place to note that we all want to envision someone spreading conspiracy as an obnoxious Alt-Right bloviating gas bag like Alex Jones, screaming and pounding his fist about chemicals in the water “turnin the frickin’ frogs gay!” or saying that Hillary Clinton is a literal demon, but that’s not always what it looks like. Sometimes it’ll be someone you admire or a friend. Just be aware of that, especially if they ask you to…

Holy Moley! Pray for the Mole Children

When I first started my book, I always thought I might find the bottom of the rabbithole, the craziest conspiracy of all. The Bohemian Grove? Reptilians? Flat Earth? Birds Aren’t Real? Nah, keep falling. But QAnon’s latest theory has got to be a contender– that coronavirus is actually a cover up to rescue the mole children. Yes, won’t someone think of the mole children?

Here’s the theory: QAnon says that there are thousands of “mole children” living in tunnels underneath Central Park. As Wonkette reports on the theory:

They have, of course, been bred for the specific purpose of being sex slaves, but also for being eaten and having their adrenal glands harvested so “elites” can get high on their adrenochrome. Which, for the 47,000th time, is not a thing anyone can get high off of.

The coronavirus emergency center set up in Central Park, they say, is to treat the mole children, some of whom are deformed or sensitive to light from living in the tunnels. Rescued children are then moved to hospital ships like the Comfort in New York and Mercy in LA (which was also the target of the guy who derailed the train there last week.)

Do people actually believe this? Yes. Are they praying for the Mole Children? You bet. Are they writing goddamn poetry about them? Hell yes.

Read more: “QAnon Idiots Very Concerned About Mole Children Now,” wonkette.com

One of Wisconsin’s Darkest Days 

On a personal note, Tuesday was an extremely fucked day in Milwaukee, the city I love. It was a batshit, terrible, dystopian day. We have a stay-at-home edict, Summerfest and the Democratic National Convention were both postponed, but the election was ordered to go on here. Not only that, but the usual 180 plus polling locations were reduced to 5 for the entire city of Milwaukee, population of about 600,000. Waukesha, a suburb of 70,000, had 1 open. Thousands of absentee ballots were requested but never arrived. Lines to vote stretched on for blocks of brave voters who had to choose– risk their health or vote. Trump’s words on the situation: “not my problem.” These games being played with people’s lives have left me sad and angry.

The next day, Bernie Sanders dropped out. Let’s ask the important questions here, like the 5 Ws (no, not the 5Gs, settle down) which are: Who, What, Where, When, and of course:

Ok! Excuse me now while I dunk my head in cold water and try to get through the rest of this week. Best wishes to all of you out there in this crazy world.

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My upcoming book American Madness features a journey through conspiracy culture. It’s out August 25, 2020 from Feral House. To pre-order: CLICK HERE

It’s on Goodreads here: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/52486773-american-madness

Follow me on:
Facebook//Twitter//Instagram//YouTube

 

Having just returned from the grocery store during an official pandemic, I’m reminded to highly recommend Apocalypse Any Day Now, from Tea Krulos, who went way down the doomsday prepper rabbit hole. Fun and unfortunately highly relevant. Do it.” — Brent Gohde, Cedar Block/ Science Strikes Back

Every Saturday during quarantine, I’m hosting online trivia via Facebook Live:

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Tea’s Weird Week Trivia: Round 2

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The second round of Tea’s Weird Week Trivia happened this last Saturday. Congrats to Estephanie, Jessica, Tom, and Wendy who each won around.

I’ll be back this Saturday, April 11 with four more rounds– Jessica won the chance to pick a trivia topic and she chose “paranormal reality TV personalities” and other categories include some of my favorite topics– “art heists,” “music urban legends,” and “dystopian novel or 6 O’clock news?” Prizes will include books (authored by myself and others) and other weird swag. Tune in this Saturday, 5pm (central), on my Facebook page: www.facebook.com/theTeaKrulos 

Here’s the questions from last week if you didn’t get a chance to play. You can get a feel for the trivia and host your own trivia session with your roommate.  Answer key is way at the bottom of the post. For this week, I am encouraging that trivia players send donations to the Cream City Hostel:  paypal.me/creamcityhostel

Warm up Question:

Bob Dylan released his first new song in 8 years this week. The song is almost 17 minutes long and is about which event that is a major conspiracy theory topic?
A.) 9/11
B.) The time Trump said the sound of wind turbines cause cancer
C.) the JFK assassination
D.) George Washington’s induction as a Mason

Missing Persons

1.) In 1971 this man hijacked a Boeing 727 and parachuted out of it between Washington and Oregon with a ransom of $200,000. He disappeared into the night leaving only an alias behind. What was the alias he is commonly known as and a bonus point if you name the actual alias he left. 

2.) In 1975 it’s believed that the mafia made union leader Jimmy Hoffa disappear. His body was never found. Who played Jimmy in the 1992 movie Hoffa and for a second point who played him in last year’s The Irishman?

3.) This rock n roll pioneer was believed to be missing or possibly dead for several days after Hurricane Katrina struck his hometown of New Orleans. He had actually been rescued by the Coast Guard and released an album the next year titled Alive and Kickin. He died in 2017.

4.) In a case that seemed to come out of their own novel, this mystery writer disappeared for about 11 days in 1926. Over ten thousand people and a team of bloodhounds searched and the writer was eventually discovered at a spa. Name the writer.
https://www.nytimes.com/2019/06/11/books/agatha-christie-vanished-11-days-1926.html

5.) In 2017 a photo emerged that allegedly shows Amelia Earhardt alive and well sitting on a dock behind a group of people. Where was the photo taken?:
A. Easter Island
B. Tristan da Cunha
C. Eroda
D. Marshall Islands

Animal King, Dumb

1. The 2005 documentary Grizzly Man tells the story of Timothy Treadwell who decides to live among grizzly bears in Alaska. Spoiler: the bears end up viciously ripping him apart. Who was the director of this award winning documentary? 

2. Herman Melville’s Moby Dick or, The Whale is the classic tale of Captain Ahab hellbent on killing a great white whale. The story is 206, 052 words long. What is the first 3-word sentence of the book? 

3. We all know Steve Irwin was killed by a stingray, but there are about 220 species of stingrays. Which kind was it? 

A. Giant oceanic Manta ray
B. Short-tail stingray
C. Blue spotted ray
D. Thorntail stingray

4.) In 2003 Vegas magic and entertainment duo Siegfried and Roy had their act cut short when a tiger named Mantecore attacked one of them, causing a severed spine among other injuries. But who was attacked– Siegfried or Roy?

Bonus point: the owner of the Mirage (where Siegfried and Roy performed) said the tiger was triggered by what hairdo on an audience member in the front row? 

5.) Myah Autry was arrested for trespassing in 2019 after video circulated of her showing inside a lion exhibit, dancing and taunting the lion. Which zoo did that happen at?
A. Bronx Zoo
B. Greater Wynnewood Exotic Animal Park
C. Detroit Zoo
D. Lincoln Park Zoo

UFO Case Files

  1. In 1980 in Suffolk, England, several personnel reported seeing a UFO outside the Royal Air Force Woodbridge base, which at the time was operated by the US Air Force. One serviceman even claimed he touched it. The case is usually referred to as the BLANK Forest Incident for the woods where it occurred. What’s the name of the forest?
    A. Notting Wood-on-Rye
    B. Sherwood
    C. Rendlesham
    D. Beesington
  2. In 1997 hundreds of people saw a strange formation of lights cruising above Arizona, Nevada, and Mexico in a V shape. What are these sightings referred to?

  3. This couple claimed that they were abducted by extra-terrestrials from the Zeta Reticuli system in 1961 in New Hampshire, paving the way for many people who have claimed to be abductees. Need both names.

  4. Starting in late 2014, researchers claimed they had discovered some Kodachrome slides in an attic in Arizona which they believed showed an extra-terrestrial body from the Roswell, New Mexico UFO crash. After much anticipation the slides were released in 2015 and the image was quickly identified as being:

    A.) A rubber alien prop from a 50s sci fi movie
    B.) A Mummified body of a child from a museum display
    C.) A Fiji mermaid taxidermy hoax from PT Barnum’s museum
    D.) A surnburnt iguana

5. The former singer of this pop punk band has turned into an advocate for UFO disclosure. One point each for the singer’s name and the band. Blink 182

Xtreme Social Distancing

1. There’s some inconsistencies to this story, but the Internet commonly reports that a Hedviga Golik died in front of her TV in Croatia and was not found for how many years?

A. 1
B. 15
C. 23
D. 42

2. Estately.com did a study to determine the best cities to be an urban hermit based on things like internet speeds, food and alcohol delivery services, affordable housing, and percentage of people who work from home. What city was number one? 1 point top 5 and 2 points if number 1.
https://www.estately.com/blog/2016/10/the-best-u-s-cities-for-todays-urban-hermits/

3. In 2018 Missionary John Chau had fishermen drop him off at the remote North Sentinel Island off the coast of India. The fisherman only went so far because they knew the tribe was known for killing any outsiders. Chau took a kayak the rest of the way. He displayed a waterproof Bible to the tribe and how did they respond?

A. Told him he was too late, Jehovah’s Witnesses had already stopped by and converted them.
B.Revealed that a CD player with the original cast recording of Jesus Christ Superstar in it had washed ashore some years ago and burst into song
C. Shot the Bible with an arrow and later shot and killed Chau

4.) Valeri Polyakov has the record for the longest single stay in space, staying aboard the Mir space station for how long?

A. 103 days
B. 365 days
C. 437 days
D. 535 days

5.) This book and film tells the story of Christopher McCandless aka Alexander Supertramp who hiked through Alaska hoping to live off the land. His dead body was found in an abandoned bus in 1992. Name of the book/movie?

ANSWERS BELOW

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My upcoming book American Madness features a journey through conspiracy culture. It’s out August 25, 2020 from Feral House. To pre-order: CLICK HERE

Follow me on:
Facebook//Twitter//Instagram//YouTube

 

Having just returned from the grocery store during an official pandemic, I’m reminded to highly recommend Apocalypse Any Day Now, from Tea Krulos, who went way down the doomsday prepper rabbit hole. Fun and unfortunately highly relevant. Do it.” — Brent Gohde, Cedar Block/ Science Strikes Back

Answers (click highlighted links for more reading material): Warm-up: C. JFK Assassination
Missing Persons: 1. D.B. Cooper/ Dan Cooper 2. Jack Nicholson/ Al Pacino 3. Fats Domino 4. Agatha Christie 5. D. Marshall Islands

Animal King, Dumb: 1. Werner Herzog 2. Call me Ishmael. 3. B. Short-tail stingray 4. Roy. Bonus: a beehive hairdo 5. A. Bronx Zoo

UFO Case Files: 1. C. Rendlesham 2. Phoenix Lights 3. Betty and Barney Hill 4. B. mummified child 5. Tom DeLonge, Blink-182

Xtreme Social Distancing: 1. D. 42 2. Top 5 (in order 1-5) Chicago, Austin, Washington DC, San Francisco, Denver 3.C. shot him 4. C. 437 days 5. Into the Wild 

 

Tea’s Weird Week Trivia: Round 1

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I had a fun first round of Tea’s Weird Week Trivia this last Saturday. Congrats to Sharon who was the overall winner and Estephanie who won the Cursed Objects round and picked out a category for this week– “Famous Missing Persons Cases.” Other rounds will include the man vs animal “Animal King, Dumb,” classic “UFO Files,” and stories about “Xtreme Social Distancing.” Prizes will include books (authored by myself and others) and other weird swag. This Saturday, 5pm (central), on my Facebook page: www.facebook.com/theTeaKrulos 

Here’s the questions from last week if you didn’t get a chance to play. You can get a feel for the trivia and host your own trivia session with your roommate.  Answer key is way at the bottom of the post. For this week, I am encouraging that trivia players send donations/ shop at the International Cryptozoology Museum: www.cryptozoologymuseum.com

Special thanks to American Ghost Walks to providing tickets for a prize!

(You can see the video of the trivia session and see how people did here: https://www.facebook.com/theTeaKrulos/videos/511195046147212/)

Cryptozoology

1.) In the late 80s/ early 90s there were several sightings in Bishopville, South Carolina of a cryptid commonly called:

A. the Bishopville Dogma
B. the Bishopville Lizardman
C. the Bishopville Octopusman
D. the Bishopville Birdman

2.) A classic examination of cryptids is the 1970 book Strange Creatures Out of Time and Space. Who was the author?

3.) Where is the International Cryptozoology Museum located? City and state. 

4.) This Australian animal was thought to have gone extinct after the last one died in captivity at the Hobart Zoo in 1936, however cryptozoologists believe it might still be alive. You can give the scientific or common name.

5). One of the big cryptozoology stories this month are pictures circulating that purportedly show a Sasquatch peeking into a couple’s mobile home. Scott Yeoman reports that the couple smelled something he described as a mix of “rotting animal flesh, vomit and excrement” before spotting the cryptid and snapping photos of it. Which state did this happen in? Picture in comments.
A. Colorado
B. Idaho
C. Washington
D. Wyoming

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Conspiracy Theories in the News

1.) In a Tea’s Weird Week column last month, I reported that at least 24 people had launched 2020 campaigns for Congress that follow what conspiracy belief?

A. That Ted Cruz is the Zodiac Killer
B. QAnon
C. Flat Earth Theory
D. 9/11 Truthers

BONUS: Which two states have the most candidates? 

2.) Alex Jones of InfoWars was issued a cease and desist by the New York attorney general for trying to sell what product he claimed would “kill the entire SARS-corona family at point blank range.” when used. Was it: 

A. A hand cream
B. Toilet paper
C. Toothpaste
D. Condoms

3.) Pour one out for “Mad Mike” Hughes, a daredevil who died when he bailed out of his homemade rocket and his parachute malfunctioned on Feb.22 outside of Barstow. What conspiracy message was written on the side of his rocket?

A. Epstein didn’t kill himself
B. Birds don’t exist
C. Trump is a Reptilian
D. Research Flat Earth

4.) Last month Trump retweeted a publication that was founded by a Chinese American spiritual movement called the Falun Gong. The publication has endorsed QAnon and other conspiracies and through sockpuppet accounts spent over 9 million dollars on pro-Trump ads. What is the name of the publication?

5.) During a Mardi Gras parade in New Orleans last month a float depicted Jeffrey Epstein being strangled by what politician?

Cursed and Possessed Items

1.) Murder, car accidents, gangrene, drug overdoses, and house fires, are just a few of the stories associated with this gem that is currenly on display at the Smithsonian National Museum of National History.


2.) This Raggedy Ann doll is supposedly possessed and was kept in a glass case by demonologists Ed and Lorraine Warren. There’s a recent movie series based on the doll. What’s the name of the doll?


3.) The Curse of the Chicago Cubs supposedly was set in place in 1945 after a tavern owner was kicked out of Wrigley Field with his smelly pet. What type of animal was it?

A. An alligator
B. A skunk
C. A billy goat
D. A pig

4. A mass produced painting popular across England in the 1980s was said to be cursed. Supposedly a series of  house fires left only the paintings behind. What did the painting feature?

A. A crying boy
B. A girl playing the violin
C. A child peeking out from a red door
D. A 3 toed sloth hang gliding with a portrait of Lee Harvey Oswald in its claws

5. Zak Bagans Haunted Museum in Las Vegas allegedly has a haunted or cursed mirror that belonged to which horror icon?

A. Stephen King
B. Edgar Allan Poe
C. Elvira, Mistress of the Dark
D. Vincent Price
E. Bela Lugosi

Epic Social Distancing Champions of History

1.) This actress known as the “Swedish Sphinx” who once said in a movie “I vant to be alone” retired in 1941 at age 36. She refused to do autographs, interviews, award shows, or fan mail and lived alone in Manhattan. 

2.) In the 1970s this musician mostly stayed at home in bed getting high and recording music known as the “Bedroom Tapes.” Though he would sometimes be spotted at night at LA clubs in his robe and slippers. 

3.) This writer had a famous novel published in 1951. After his last story was published in 1965 in the New Yorker the already reclusive author secluded himself in a cottage in New Hampshire. 

4.) After forfeiting his world champion title in 1975, this chess player became reclusive, disappearing from the public for long periods of time until he died in 2008 in Iceland. 

5.) Tristan da Cunha most remote populated place in the world, over 1300 miles from their nearest populated neighbor, located between south america and africa. A mail ship stops by only once a year.  2019 estimated population was: 

A. 99
B. 3
C. 246
D. 500

Answers below!

71W0ds4iljL
My upcoming book American Madness features a journey through conspiracy culture. It’s out August 25, 2020 from Feral House. To pre-order: CLICK HERE

Follow me on:
Facebook//Twitter//Instagram//YouTube

 

Having just returned from the grocery store during an official pandemic, I’m reminded to highly recommend Apocalypse Any Day Now, from Tea Krulos, who went way down the doomsday prepper rabbit hole. Fun and unfortunately highly relevant. Do it.” — Brent Gohde, Cedar Block/ Science Strikes Back

 

ANSWERS (click on highlighted answers to see more!)

Cryptozoology: 1. B. Bishopville Lizardman 2. John Keel 3. Portland, Maine 4. Thylacine or Tasmanian Tiger 5. A. Colorado

Conspiracy Theories in the News: 1. B.QAnon, BONUS: California and Florida 2. C. Toothpaste 3. D. Research Flat Earth 4. The Epoch Times 5. Hillary Clinton

Cursed or Possessed Items: 1. the Hope Diamond 2. Annabelle 3. C. billy goat 4. A. a crying boy 5. E. Bela Lugosi

Epic Social Distancing Champions of History: 1. Greta Garbo 2. Brian Wilson 3. J.D. Salinger 4. Bobby Fischer 5. C. 246

Tea’s Weird Week: Notes from the Quarantine Journal

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UPDATE, April 4: The Wisconsin Historical Society is “collecting history as it happens” with their COVID-19 Journal Project. They compare it to the WHS’s project in 1861, where Civil War soldiers were asked to keep diaries. 150 years later, those journals are still being used to understand history. By signing up for this program, you are not only giving yourself an outlet for your thoughts, but you are contributing to something that future generations can learn from. Your story is important and the WHS is open to written, audio, visual, or artistic documentation. You can find more info and sign up here: https://wisconsinhistory.org/JOURNALPROJECT

I tried to do a Tea’s Weird Week livestream. It started alright, I talked about my book Apocalypse Any Day Now, but then I was hit with this wave of doubt and angst– who am I to give any kind of advice? and I struggled to say anything other than “gee I sure hope you are all ok out there.” The only thing helpful I think I offered was talking about my quarantine journal or, as I’ve crudely titled it, my “Plague Diary.” It’s been helpful for me and it might be helpful for you.

I found an old notebook and every day I’ve been handwriting some notes. I’ve not been overthinking it– emotions, observations, weird dreams, what I’m reading, watching, doing. I chose to handwrite it because I like the organic look of it– crossed out words, doodles in the corners of the pages. When you have to handwrite instead of letting words fly on a keyboard, you’re choosing more deliberately what you share. It’s also cathartic to scratch out some words pen to paper. But you might journal better on a blog or word doc.

If writing isn’t a way you express yourself, I hope you’re channeling some energy into something you like– music, art, organizing. I know it’s difficult to be creative under financial and other stresses, but try to turn off the news, get off social media, and try to do something that stimulates creation a little bit every day.

I’m not going to share the whole thing, but here’s some excerpts from the first 10 days of my journal.

Friday, March 13 (first entry): National emergency declared. Everything is closing down now, RE: coronavirus, COVID-19. The plague is upon us. Worse than the illness is how people will react– they are panicked, scared. Hyper masses have flooded every store, grabbing as much toliet paper, hand sanitizer, and water bottles as they can carry, leaving the store shelves empty.

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Sunday, March 15: Just drank and watched TV.

Monday, March 16: I had a vivid dream last night. My granddad was still alive and I went to visit him. He had a group of elderly friends sitting around his kitchen table (where he always sat) with him. They were having a quarantine party. I had never seen any of the other seniors before. One of them, sitting next to grandpa, was a frail woman with an oxygen tank. Grandpa, usually a big, jolly guy, looked very thin. All of them were happy to see me. Grandpa asked if I wanted to sing “Folsom Prison Blues” with them. I said “sure!” and we all sang. That’s all I remember.

Tuesday, March 17: St. Patrick’s Day– one of the biggest day for bars– and everything is shut down. I pitched and wrote an article for the Shepherd “How local businesses are weathering COVID-19 and ways you can help” but there’s a feeling of hopelessness– this article won’t help anyone one iota, but I need to do something and this is all I can think of at the moment.

Thursday, March 19: Crabby, irritated, sad, frustrated today. Not accomplishing shit. Being lazy in pajamas makes me feel shitty but so does doing anything like household chores. Face it– you lost today.

Saturday, March 21: Well, all of this has made a supply run exciting. Me and Kate cruised to Home Depot, Krispy Kreme Donuts, Target (see above photo of the empty toilet paper aisle), and the liquor store. Now eating tons of food.

Monday, March 23: Gov. Evers is issuing a “Safer at Home” edict telling everyone not involved in “non-essential” business-like groceries, pharmacies, etc., to keep their ass at home. We’re all locked down now to slow the spread of COVID-19. I took a walk to Outpost to look for toilet paper and get a couple things for Kate, but they were out of TP and the bulk section was closed off, so I left empty-handed and felt like a failed hunter-gatherer. But we are ok on food, TP, and sanity right now…

I’m going to try the livestream thing again with some trivia this Saturday. The categories are cryptozoology, conspiracy theories in the news (based on reports from Tea’s Weird Week over the last two months), cursed or possessed items, and a surprise category. Prizes will include copies of my books and other weird stuff I find in my office. 

Tune in here: www.facebook.com/TheTeaKrulos

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The #TrumpConspiracyCounter shoots up to 174. I tally it and talk about Trump’s “Deep State Department” theory here: https://teakrulos.com/2020/03/25/trumpconspiracycounter-march-25/

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My upcoming book American Madness features a journey through conspiracy culture. It’s out August 25, 2020 from Feral House. To pre-order: CLICK HERE

Follow me on:
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Having just returned from the grocery store during an official pandemic, I’m reminded to highly recommend Apocalypse Any Day Now, from Tea Krulos, who went way down the doomsday prepper rabbit hole. Fun and unfortunately highly relevant. Do it.” — Brent Gohde, Cedar Block/ Science Strikes Back

Book Giveaway!

Hey there, I hope your COVID-19 quarantine is going as good as it can be. Hang in there. I’ve been trying to catch up on some reading and I’m sure many of you have extra reading time, too, so I’m giving away two copies each of my books Apocalypse Any Day Now and Heroes in the Night. I think both books are as relevant now as ever as we try to navigate through this frightening, weird time.

To win a copy, share this post and then leave a comment on this post (here on the website or my social media posts, see links below) telling us all how you’re passing time during the quarantine or any experiences or observations you want to share. I’ll be entering all names into a drawing to select the four winners. Contest open til Monday, March 23, noon (CST).

Thanks and be well!

Yours Truly,

Tea Krulos

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Links to my books (click title):

Apocalypse Any Day Now: Deep Underground with America’s Doomsday Preppers

Having just returned from the grocery store during an official pandemic, I’m reminded to highly recommend Apocalypse Any Day Now, from Tea Krulos, who went way down the doomsday prepper rabbit hole. Fun and unfortunately highly relevant. Do it.” — Brent Gohde, Cedar Block/ Science Strikes Back

Tea’s Weird Week: 2019 Review

“Tea Krulos is one of the best chroniclers out there of the total craziness of our world today, and he does not disappoint in this book. He has a wickedly keen eye for high strangeness and a great voice to bring it to light. Well worth your time.” — Mitch Smith, Goodreads/Amazon review

Heroes in the Night: Inside the Real Life Superhero Movement 

Heroes in the Night is a deftly written, entertaining book that sheds light on the strange but timely, understandable and relevant subculture that is the RLSH movement.”– Pop Mythology

Monster Hunters: On the Trail with Ghost Hunters, Bigfooters, Ufologists, and Other Paranormal Investigators

“Tea Krulos’s Monster Hunters is not your average ‘seen-it-all-before’ study of Sasquatch, aliens, and creepy critters. It’s an eye-opening, witty, and insightful look at the people who have dedicated their lives to solving some of the world’s biggest mysteries. In many ways, the characters Krulos crosses paths with are as unique and fascinating as the ‘things’ they seek!” —Nick Redfern, author of Monster Diary and Monster Files

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My upcoming book American Madness features a journey through conspiracy culture. It’s out August 25, 2020 from Feral House. To pre-order: CLICK HERE

Follow me on:
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Tea’s Weird Week: Notes From the Quarantine, Part 1

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What a time– I hope everyone is doing ok and hanging in there. A majority of my friends are artists, musicians, writers, teachers, small business owners, service industry workers or some combination thereof– all hit hard by the COVID-19 quarantine that has shut down daily life as we know it. People are stuck at home, worrying about making ends meet. I’ve also seen some inspiring acts of people caring for each other and supporting each other as a community.

I don’t have anything profound to say other than I’m wishing you all well. This is a crazy crazy time but I know that readers of Tea’s Weird Week are creative and resourceful and we’ll make it through. For this column, I just want to share some stuff I’ve been into the last few days.

Listening:

–I saw this shared somewhere, and this is my favorite new site: Radio Garden. It allows you to drag a cursor around a globe and click on livestreams of radio stations around the world. Listen to broadcasts in Kalamazoo or Amsterdam or Cape Town. I don’t know, there’s just something nice about hearing that other people are out there in the world and hear what they’re currently talking about and rocking out to.

–Feral House (publisher of my upcoming book American Madness) did a podcast episode interviewing Aton Edwards of director of the International Prepardness Network. Insightful with good tips. Listen here: https://feralhouse.podbean.com/e/special-episode-march-14-2020-preparedness-now-pandemic-prep-w-aton-edwards/

–I’ve been listening to the daily CNN podcast Coronavirus: Fact vs Fiction. It’s a short listen with episodes 7-15 minutes in length. Great to listen to while during tasks around the house. If you’ve followed this column you know there is a metric shit ton of misinfo out there, so a dose of factual reporting feels great.

Watching:

I think it’s really cool that everyone from the Dropkick Murphys to the Paris Opera are offering free streaming performances. Lots more of these are popping up, so do some online searching for your favorite artists/ genres and I’m sure you’ll find something. I watched the Murphs live in Boston and enjoyed it. It’s not different than concert video footage, but there was a little bit of excitement that they were live, doing it for their fans, who were watching live with you around the world.

Other virtual events include movie watch parties via Facebook and other platforms and having an online happy hour on-nomi (Japanese: “online drinking”) party on video conferencing sites like Zoom. My friends have been doing this and I can’t wait to join in.

Another way of taking a look at the world while stuck at home is taking a virtual tour of museums. I haven’t checked these out yet, but I will be next week. I’m planning on deliberatly scheduling them like I would normally do something (like write “check out the Lourve, 5pm Tuesday” on my calendar.)

Mental Floss has a listicle of 12 online museum tours here: https://www.mentalfloss.com/article/75809/12-world-class-museums-you-can-visit-online

Writing:

This might be a shocker, but I didn’t get into writing to be rich or famous. It’s something I love to do and it’s therapeutic for me. It is sometimes all I got. This is a good time for you to try it out and work on your writing ideas, even if it’s something that never gets published. On Friday the 13th I started a “Plague Diary” in an empty notebook I had stashed away in a desk drawer. I haven’t done much journaling in life (usually too busy chasing someone else’s story) but I thought now was a good time to spend some time each day writing down some of my emotions, thoughts, and anything else that crosses my mind– I had a strange dream that my grandfather was still alive and hosting a quarantine party, for example.

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This journaling might lead to something (I’ll probably share some excerpts from the journal in this column in the future), or we might all hit the sunny streets when this is all over and it’ll be forgotten. But it might be of interest to look at this 10, 20 years from now and remember the COVID-19 days of 2020. Writing is my way of making sense of things. For you, it might be creating art or music. I hope you are not spending all of your time worrying and have something to like this to offer some balance.

Reading:

It’s a good time to catch up on your reading list. I’ve got a stack of books I’m cruising through. I also read Edgar Allan Poe’s “The Masque of the Red Death.” Pandemic dystopia reading probably isn’t for everyone at this time, but I like to take a deep dive into things so I’ll be reading more stuff along these lines.

My friends at Lion’s Tooth are doing an online fundraiser toward getting a brick and mortar location and they’re offering pledge levels for receiving a subscription package of cool zines and books. In light of the quarantine, they’re offering to send off your first subscription package right away. I can’t think of anything better than a surprise package of good reading material right now. Check out their Indiegogo for more info here: https://www.indiegogo.com/projects/support-milwaukee-s-newest-bookstore#/

Here’s links to two of my Tea’s Weird Week reading lists, all titles on them recommended:

Fall Reading List / Winter Reading List (I’m working on a Spring one now).

Of course, I would be poor at self-promotion if I didn’t plug my own books for quarantine reading. I’ve lost some work so buying a book (or buying me a coffee: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/TeaKrulos) is very much appreciated. Now is a good time to read Apocalypse Any Day Now: Deep Underground with America’s Doomsday Preppers which talks about prepping and apocalyptic visions and I also have a collection of the Tea’s Weird Week columns I wrote in 2019 as a Kindle e-book ($1.99/ free on Kindle Unlimited) Tea’s Weird Week: 2019 Review.

Stay tuned because tomorrow I’ll be offering a FREE BOOK GIVEAWAY CONTEST here at teakrulos.com for copies of my books!

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Conspiracy News

As always, click the highlighted links to see my source material. I’m still following conspiracy theory news (I can’t help it, old habits) and as you can imagine, there is a tidal wave of conspiracy, fear, paranoia, and anger crashing in. (See my last column, “M-M-M-My Corona” for some examples). The COVID-19 shutdown has caused people to snap. Witness the defiant dumbness of Kid Rock, who refused to close his bar or the total Twitter meltdown from former Milwaukee Sheriff David Clarke Jr., who urged people to defy orders to stay home and tied the pandemic to conspiracy boogeyman George Soros.

I’ve seen a couple puzzling posts floating around saying “Anti-vaxxers sure are quiet right now” and “where is Alex Jones in all this?” Umm– no they are not and believe me, he’s as loud and shrill as ever. Alex Jones, along with televangelist Jim Bakker were both ordered to stop trying to sell phony coronavirus cures. Bakker had a bogus silver solution and Jones made the claim that his special Anti-coronavirus toothpaste “kills the whole SARS-corona virus family at point-blank range.” New punk/metal band name: Alex Jones and the Anti-coronavirus Toothpaste Sham.

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Celebrity gossip columnist turned QAnon theorist Liz Crokin.

I also discovered the craziest coronavirus conspiracy theorist of all time, Liz Crokin. Crokin used to be a celebrity gossip columnist (her specialty was celebrity breakups) until she had some serious medical issues. Afterward, she became known as a feverish Trump supporter and QAnon advocate. QAnon believes that Trump is secretly working on a program called “The Storm” which will round up a Democrat-Satanic-Pedophile ring. Her recent theories related to the pandemic:

–Coronavirus is a cover story so the military can round up and make mass arrests of the Deep State unnoticed.

–Beloved actor Tom Hanks is an example of this pedophile ring which is why the story leaked that he had COVID-19. (Note: he’s since quickly recovered, so it wasn’t a very good cover story, apparently. But then she said that the virus was real and celebrities like Hanks and Idris Alba were contracting it from drinking adrenochrome.

–She also tweeted “I grow my own cultured mud scrubs in my backyard, but right now it’s probably best to not wash your hands at all- skin mites and oil are all you need to combat this bacteria.” Yick. Thankfully, her Twitter account was suspended.

I think I’ve been on the Internet too long.

Please Clap Dept.: Thank you, Cult of Weird, for including my upcoming book American Madness on this list of “5 Upcoming Weird Books You Can Pre-order Right Now” at: https://www.cultofweird.com/books/upcoming-weird-books-2020/

The #TrumpConsiracyCounter is taking a quarantine break, but will be back next week. 

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My upcoming book American Madness features a journey through conspiracy culture. It’s out August 25, 2020 from Feral House. To pre-order: CLICK HERE

Follow me on:
Facebook//Twitter//Instagram//YouTube

 

Having just returned from the grocery store during an official pandemic, I’m reminded to highly recommend Apocalypse Any Day Now, from Tea Krulos, who went way down the doomsday prepper rabbit hole. Fun and unfortunately highly relevant. Do it.” — Brent Gohde, Cedar Block/ Science Strikes Back

Tea’s Weird Week: Doomer Fatigue, I Got It

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Let’s review this long, long year of 2020 so far. It feels like Biblical plagues are sweeping the earth. In less than two months we’ve seen wildfires destroy Australia, the Doomsday Clock tick forward to 100 seconds to midnight, Antarctica heated up to 65(F) degrees (the warmest on record), a deadly outbreak of coronavirus (and a wave of racism, paranoia, and conspiracy to go along with the real threat) and a plague of locusts in Somalia.

Here at home in the US of A, where to even begin, seriously? I’m about one headline away from getting into Mad Max gear and running down the street with a bug-out bag yelling “THE END IS NIGH!”

Maybe this is all for the best in the long run. A new book titled The Ahuman Manifesto: Activism for the End of the Anthropocene by Professor Patricia MacCormack of Cambridge. It apparently makes the argument that the only way to save the planet is for a mass extinction to happen. That’s an oversimplification, I know– I haven’t read the book, but it’s on the old reading list. I’m interested to read it, but can I handle it?

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I think I know what I got a case of.

While I was working on my book Apocalypse Any Day Now, I learned about an ailment one prepper author called “doomer fatigue.” It’s a stressful depression you feel when you burn yourself out thinking about how incredibly screwed the world is. As I worked on the book, I researched ideas about the world ending, from the ridiculous to the frighteningly plausible. It was tiring. When I did interviews for the book, I sometimes joked I was going to cleanse the palate after the book was done by reading nothing but Hello Kitty. Haw haw, Tea Krulos sipping merlot, soaking up some kawaii! Good joke. Everybody laugh.

I know there is still hope. I think I’ll shake this doomer fatigue off. Usually going for a walk, some good music, and a dose of Vitamin C helps. Maybe I’ll pick up that Hello Kitty comic I was talking about.

Please Clap Dept.: Speaking of Apocalypse Any Day Now, author Linda S. Godfrey wrote about it in a post about books and bookmarks here: lindagodfrey.com/2020/02/17/mark-my-words-5-books-i-love-and-finding-the-good-parts
I have a new YouTube channel for my upcoming book, American Madness. Please subscribe here: www.youtube.com/channel/UCoFCwzjjghaVXSWUwEZx27g/playlists

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My upcoming book American Madness features a journey through conspiracy culture, including QAnon. It’s out August 25, 2020 from Feral House. To pre-order: CLICK HERE

Follow me on:
Facebook//Twitter//Instagram//YouTube

“For some reason, though some of his observations are alarming, whenever I read Tea’s work I feel better because of his level-headed reportage and humor.” –Lee Gutowski, editor, Riverwest Currents

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What a week for the Trump Crime Family! Trump grants clemency to fellow Hair Club member Blago (who announces he is now a “Trumpocrat”), tells Rush Limbaugh to “never apologize” for his homophobic comments, and his former adviser, 7-time felon conspiracy theorist Roger Stone, got sentenced today to 3 years, 4 months in prison, less than half of the Department of Justice’s 7-9 year recommendation. Meanwhile, we’re still keeping track of every time Trump retweets or promotes a conspiracy theory, theorist, or media outlet.

83.) Feb.10:  Sometimes it’s hard to tell if something is the promotion of a conspiracy or just a straight-up lie. At a rally in New Hampshire, Trump tells the crowd he lost the state because “hundreds of buses from Massachusetts” were sent in full of people committing voter fraud. There’s no evidence of mass voter fraud in the 2016 election.
Source: “Trump Baselessly Claims He Lost New Hampshire in 2016 Due to ‘Hundreds of Buses’ From Massachusetts,” Talking Points Memo

84.) Feb.13: Trump on former advisor and conspiracy theorist Roger Stone: “significant bias at the ‘Justice’ Department,” quote marks his.

85-96.) Feb.19: An 11 streak tweetstorm retweeting posts by Tom Fitton and his organization Judicial Watch including ones where he talks about “draining the Deep State,” the Spygate theory, and talks about Roger Stone’s “miscarriage of justice.”

That’s all the analysis I got for today. Like I said, doomer fatigue.

For a frightening read on the upcoming tidal wave of misinformation, lies, fearmongering, and conspiracy theory in the 2020 campaign, I recommend: “The Billion Dollar Misinformation Campaign to Reelect the President,” McKay Coppins, The Atlantic.

The #TrumpConspiracyCounter is on Twitter: https://twitter.com/TrumpConspirac3

 

 

 

 

Tea’s Weird Week: Strange Birthday Adventures

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Some of my birthdays have been memorable and others mundane. I had a birthday yesterday, and I spent it doing what I love doing best– sitting around in pajamas, drinking coffee, reviewing a manuscript I wrote. I have a book out next year from Feral House titled American Madness. It’s a non-fiction that tells the action-packed story of a conspiracy theorist I met and the prevalence of conspiracy culture in America. There’s still work to be done, but a lot of progress has happened on the book over the last few months.

Sitting at home reading over my work was great, but my really fun birthdays have been getting out in the field. Here’s two memorable examples:

2013: I spent my 36th birthday in Portland, Maine where I interviewed cryptozoologist and author Loren Coleman at the International Cryptozoology Museum. What a wonderful place to be! I wrote about the experience as the first chapter of my book Monster Hunters, titled “The Monster Hunter and His Museum.” Loren named the book as the top of the “Best Cryptozoology Books of 2015” list and told me that the chapter was “required reading” for new staff, volunteers, and docents.

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I took this picture of Loren Coleman at the International Cryptozoology Museum.

2017: It was two days after my birthday, but I spent my 40th birthday preparing to voyage out to the desert to attend Wasteland Weekend, a post-apocalyptic festival. One of the most fun experiences I’ve had. I witnessed music, Thunderdome fights, a post-apocalyptic swimsuit contest, and much more, which I wrote out for a chapter of my book Apocalypse Any Day Now titled “Wastelanders.” I’ve really wanted to go back ever since, but this year my travel budget is tied up for a trip I’m doing to Dallas in November. Hopefully, in 2020 I can return to the Waste.

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My selfie at the 2017 Wasteland Weekend.

If you’d like to support me on my birthday and help me go on more wild and crazy adventures, the best thing you can do is buy or support my books:

Heroes in the Night

Monster Hunters

Apocalypse Any Day Now

And look for links in 2020 to my new books. Wisconsin Legends & Lore is going to be a cool little book out from History Press and American Madness: The Story of the Phantom Patriot and How Conspiracy Theory Hijacked American Consciousness will be out August 2020 from Feral House.

You can also buy me a birthday coffee here: www.buymeacoffee.com/TeaKrulos

And follow me on social media: Twitter: @TeaKrulos Facebook: facebook.com/TheTeaKrulos

Tea’s Weird Week: Pondering Eternal Life

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“You get what anybody gets– you get a lifetime,” Neil Gaiman, Sandman

“But that’s the way I like it baby, I don’t wanna live forever,” Motörhead, “The Ace of Spades”

I recently got a nice review for my book Apocalypse Any Day Now in the Lexington Dispatch. But listen to how this reviewer describes me: “a middle aged freelance journalist from Wisconsin.” Middle aged? Ahhh shit. Well, I guess it’s true, because in just a few days, it’ll be my 43rd birthday. But what if this wasn’t middle age for me?

Learning about something new, fringe, and strange is one of my favorite things, so it was jackpot time when I found out that local legend Kristan T. Harris is a candidate for the U.S. Transhumanist Party. The party’s main platform is to extend human life by hundreds and thousands of years, with the eventual goal of eternal life.

I wrote an article on Harris’s campaign for Milwaukee Record, in an article published today: “Long Live Candidate Harris, Milwaukee’s U.S. Transhumanist Party presidential hopeful.”

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The U.S. Transhumanist Party infinity logo

I think the ideas put forth by U.S. Transhumanist Party are interesting and I certainly love to see new alternative political parties. In fact, I took the ten seconds it takes to join the party by Google form here: https://transhumanist-party.org/membership/

Despite that, I don’t really subscribe to the party’s main platform. Here’s the thing– I don’t want to extend my life by hundreds or thousands or infinite years. Hellllll no. I am way too tired of your bullshit to have to deal with it for a millennium. I was young, I am apparently now middle aged, I will (hopefully) get old and then I will die. I’m totally fine with that timeline and I’m not afraid of it.

I’ve seen brilliant, beautiful people die way sooner than they should have while rotten jerks seem to live on forever. Do you really want some piece of shit who gets away with beating his wife and kids and makes life miserable for his family, co-workers, and the general public to celebrate his 600th birthday?

I also don’t feel life extension would be in the top ten issues we are facing today. Who wants to live forever on a planet where the environment is being completely destroyed, our oceans are filled with garbage, climate is spiraling out of control, children are locked up in cages on the border, and we have a killer clown as President?

That being said, good luck to Candidate Harris and the Transhumanist Party. Their online presidential primary starts on Sept. 21: www.transhumanist-party.org

Links

I’m going to be at the Old Baraboo Inn for the World’s Largest Ghost Hunt on Sept.28, where I’ll be talking about the ghost of Al Capone!: https://www.facebook.com/events/379959039385127/

Twitter: @TeaKrulos Facebook: www.facebook.com/TheTeaKrulos